The Eyes Have Had It

Saturday, April 12, 2014

"Stop making that face."

Don't squint.  

Stop rolling your eyes.

Always sleep on your back.

Never rub your eyes even when they are itchy.

Remove all makeup before bed.  No exceptions.

Use non medicated eyedrops for dry eyes.

Use under eye cream.

Use under eye gel.

Use sunscreen under your eyes.

Don't touch the area around your eyes.

Massage around your eyes.

Make sure you are gentle with your eyes.

Growing up my mother had warned me about my expressiveness potentially being hazardous for my looks.  I don't do "poker face" very well.  My whole face moves while I talk, my lips curl when I am self conscious, my brows move up and down while I listen and I look every which way as I think.  I am now about the age my mom must have been when she started telling me to stop doing all of that, and frankly, I get it.  She was right.  No, it's not because I have a daughter whose reactions drive me crazy, whose eye rolls push my buttons.  I agree because I am now in my late thirties, and my face, my eye area specifically, is starting to show its wear and tear.

When looking into the hand held mirror post facial (and by the way, we all know what damage can be done when peering into a magnifying hand held mirror), Ms. Meticulous gave me a bit of serum to pat under my eyes after I'd pointed out that they looked lighter but still tired.  When I showed her the leftover gel on my finger tip she said, "just pat it over your wrinkles, referring to the corners of my eyes (WHAT?!?!?) and there too, definitely on those small wrinkles," pointing between my brows.  (excuse me? Gulp)

I wasn't prepared for that.  I wasn't prepared for being "there" yet.  I can deal with hyper pigmentation, or with adult breakouts, or dry patches, but wrinkles--  wrinkles that are not exactly obvious from an acceptable personal distance, but are evident enough to require some extra product, I was dumbfounded.  If my mind at that moment had a score, it would have been the sound of silence ... and a few crickets…

The following evening at the event celebrating Troy Surrat's makeup line at BarneysNY, I was swiftly taken under the wing of CoutureStyle Sheyla. Now, I am well acquainted with concealer.  Though I agree with Bobbi Brown and most every other makeup artist out there that it is "the secret to the universe,"  I had to do a mental shift when I started feeling her light touch with Surréaliste Skin Concealer move from under my eye, in towards my bridge, and lightly up from the inner corner to about a third of the way onto my lid.  "Wow," I thought to myself, "it's come to this."  

Therein lies the magic of makeup, therein lies the fun in cosmetics, you really can look the way you already feel, or want to feel with the right product, and when we are really lucky, with the touch of a skilled professional. The effect was more than pleasing.  I looked freshly polished with a kicked up smoked out eye thanks to her effortless wielding of the Smoky Eye Baton.  You can see the result on my IG account here (mind you I realize I was standing directly under an overhead light = shadows).

I will embrace the addition of a wrinkle busting element to my routine, and accept that my concealing regimen now covers more real estate around my eyes.  I have to.  And I want to … because let's face it, no matter how much we fret, don't we ladies all think makeup and skincare is fun?  My eyes look back at themselves when I look in the mirror and more often than not, they look like they've had it, at least for now.  Time to start treating them even better.  I never see women at a makeup counter frowning when they buy new products.  Aren't we always smiling, excited and laughing when we walk away?  Oh you don't?  Well… you should!  Pouting won't help.  Apprehension won't wipe it away.

So yes, my eyes may have had it. So let's move on and play.  There are too many fun products and options out there to make this tedious for us. We may as well enjoy the challenge.  What do you use?  What advice have you followed all your life?  What do you think about your eye area?

If I choose to go through life with my eyes closed, they may as well look as good as Audrey's!  Photo source.

If you have no answers to share, maybe you need to come to the Marina tomorrow and find some!

What a coincidence!  

Time to come out and play if you are a local San Francisco reader and want to talk eyes, skin care, colors, hair, etc.  in person!  It's the beauty event I am co hosting with the fun loving Wannabe Fashion Blogger at The Social Beauty Company with 5% of all service and product sales going to Dress for Success San Francisco, tomorrow April 13 from 11-2pm.  A few free tickets may still be available here.  We are going to serve spring cocktails from BevMo and coffee, pastries and refreshments from our neighborhood buddies at LaBoulangerie Union and Hint Water.  And of course, there is a raffle.  It wouldn't be a reader brunch bloggy style without one!  So what do you think?  Is it a date????

Lessons from My Laundry

Tuesday, April 8, 2014

If there is something that I have been figuring out this week (and aren't I always figuring out something)   is that things seem to fall into place right when you take a breath.  I wonder if it's the way laundry feels, being tousled and turned in the washing machine.   Front loaded or not, it is still disorienting for the clothes, even though it is supposed to be gentler than a conventional machine.  They get whipped around, first hot, then cold, drenched, drained, soaked, rinsed, and spun once more.  All in the effort of getting them clean and back to normal.  I wonder if the clothes are like me, knowing that the wash is a periodic part of life that gets us back to our cores while testing our strength and resilience.  Delicates or not, the laundry can't wait for the drum to stop and for the long awaited time to hang out on the drying rack to commence.   

Real time photo of my laundry drying on our trusted rack…the most relaxing period in their wash and wear lives.  Made with StudioDesign.  

Before going back out into the world or stuffed into drawers, I am like that hanging laundry.  Laying still, stretching out, lying in the sun, or simply in a temperature controlled room.  I feel refreshed, I feel clean, I feel whole.  I look forward to that moment after the wild cyclone, and need to trust that the moment will always come.  

Even socks get their moment of shavasana, at least in my world.

You Just Need to Ask

Friday, April 4, 2014

My inbox greeted me this morning with an email from my old friend, Hamburgirl, that charming, spontaneous, loving lady who became my friend many moons ago and has stayed close to my heart though we haven't shared continents in over at least a decade and a half.

"bp!! How are you?? "the note began very casually.  She shortly recapped the past two weeks saying she had been home alone with her children while her husband was away for work.  The younger child had been ill the whole time and " …  very generously shared her sickness with me :("

She continued, 

"On that note, my cousin will be in Paris next week and given my last two challenging weeks as a single sick mama, I am now considering a quick escape from life and a couple days in Paris.  I am thinking of going for two-three days.  I know you're in another time zone, but thought I'd still ask 'cause nothing happens without asking!  Perhaps you are free and can get lucky with a cheap last minute ticket?  Any chance you can have a spur of the moment girls' weekend in Paris?  Be spontaneous :) 


Image from here, edited with StudioDesign 

I hit the reply button immediately and typed:

This is the exact email I needed this moment, Hamburgirl, you have no idea.  You are 100% right, nothing happens without asking and I love that you invited me to escape with you to Paris!

I am still that girl who would, but alas, the timing is not right! Perhaps we can escape there another time because we ARE due for one great spontaneous girls' weekend!

I find myself seeing the glass is half full in life, yet with this optimism comes some downsides... Often convincing myself after one hard thing after the next that "it's all good" when in fact the best thing to do would be to say "screw this" and hibernate! Lol!  Just last night over Viber, a dear friend said something to the effect of,  "it's no wonder you're so tired. Things haven't seemed easy for you lately." And they haven't. BUT I hold tight to my girlish optimism, to my 'get on with it' attitude, and when all else fails, Hamburgirl, I just fake it with my $5 smile (I learned those funny smiles from you when we still lived in Manila, trying to get your way w/ waiters and security guards- and succeeding).

So go! Go to Paris and have that grand escape.  Do it for yourself and for the all spontaneous ladies out there who could have as they once were, but cannot because of the women they now need to be.  Sometimes the timing isn't right, but sometimes it is... You just need to ask.

Thank you for thinking of me and please send me a postcard when you arrive at the City of Light!

Much love,

Tour Eiffel by Carin Olsson

What I Need

Monday, March 31, 2014

Bold Brilliant Beautiful You. Month 3.

What is it that I need?

This is dedicated especially to you,  my fellow Bold Brilliant Beautiful You participants.  We all need not compare the importance and relevance of our own needs to the next person's.  I think that is what was hard for many of us and why on the very last day of March I am not the only member writing her third installment of #bbby posts.

If you have been following my blog this month, you know that I have been simultaneously cryptic and frank about what I need.  But there is much that I still need today.   Moving into spring, this topic is excellent because I am thinking what needs to be done in line with my work as a writer, blogger and regular person in her daily life.  If we don't take the time to think about what we need, we can just keep going in circles.  So I thank you, Amy Christie, for giving us this exercise, because in it, I am finding focus.

January 2014  Salt Lake City.  I NEEDED to speak to Garance Doré.  Photo ℅  Alt Summit Flickr Stream.

I need to believe that within me already lay the tools to be successful, therefore I need to trust in my thoughts and ideas.

I need to create more structure in my week so that I may feel more effortless during my day.

I need to prepare for my collaborative blog reader event.  I need to believe that some of my readers will actually go.  

I need to be less apprehensive about applying as a contributor to online publications and other blogs that I enjoy and respect.

I need to find a way to bottle that feeling in my heart when a chunky toddler in all of her squishy and smiling glory runs to me as I squat down to give her a big big hug.

I need to know that muscle and strength don't build themselves purely from intention and that I actually enjoy the positive and welcoming atmosphere in my gym.

I need to recap the little moments that make my days special.

I really need to give more support to people, businesses and products that address gluten and dairy intolerance in spite of my love and undying affection for Tartine,   b. patisserie, and La Boulange. even though I claim not to mind the painful consequences.  

I need to spend more time in nature.  I really do miss that.  My mind and body crave it.

I need even more color, more design, and more art in my life.  It makes me so happy when there is.

Nobody knows what I need more than I do.  

Throughout the year, I am joining forces with some blogging friends from around the country to motivate and encourage ourselves and others to be bold and to step out from behind the lens, projects, and in some cases, mama status, to show ourselves.  That's right, this project is for us… it is for YOU.

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